The joys of being married to a doctor

What is it like being married to a medical resident? For all those who wonder walk a day in the shoes of PC Man....

1. You wake up often to a person who recites string of diseases and yells out various body parts in her sleep

2. Scrubs and white coats make up the majority of your laundry every week.

3. You know you have a spouse in theory but at times you can't place when you last saw them

4. Your spouse seriously thinks coffee should be made available in I.V form

5. You cannot watch a medical show without hearing complaints about what they are doing wrong and guffaw about upside down x rays.

6. You cannot walk into malls without your spouse commenting on the BMI and heart risks of completely strange obese men.

7. A weekend of fun needs to be planned a year in advance

8. You have at least 7-8 stationary items with names of prescription drugs on them at home

9. You've spent more money on the various "scopes" than on a car payment.

10. You are a ready made guinea pig whenever she wants to practice her physical examination skills.

11. You cannot complain of a sore throat or ear pain without being ready to have things with light shoved into them to take a closer look.

12. Your spouse is capable of making the person seated next to you at a restaurant throw up just by discussing her day to day adventures.

13.Your 3 year old touches your forehead and declares you have a infection and takes out a paper to scribble a prescription.

14. Your doc wife marvels you with her ability to snore in a busy crowded restaurant while waiting for food.

15. Sight of blood doesn't unfaze her unless it's her own whereas anything in red makes you squirm.

16. You can't walk out of the bathroom having scrubbing your hands for less than a minute without hearing a voice reminding you of all the names of deadly germs that are now going to go down your alimentary tract.

17. You found your birthday presents wrapped in a crepe bandage and fastened with micro pore tape.

18. Your 3 year old walks around with a "pager" and knows words like antibiotics, pneumonia and diarrhoea.

19. She thinks catheterizing the child on those long road trips is a good idea

20. You tell her that she is getting on your nerve and she proceeds to draw a accurate picture of nerve and asks which anatomical area should she place the stick person representing her?

21. You complain you are developing stomach ulcers due to stress of waiting on her and she cheerfully asks whether she can be present for your endoscopy as ulcers would be cool to see.

What can I say?Isn't he lucky to have me?

Walk in my shoes for a day

Hello!My mom is currently having a barfing competition with herself and has decided to make bathroom her space of nirvana and dad is left literally manning the kitchen trying to conjure concoctions that will hopefully be approved by me. He has high hopes what can I say? Anyway so I decided to utilize this time and take you guys along with me just to let you know how a typical weekend goes on in Ina's winter world.....

1.As you can see the day begins with me taking over the kitchen and educating my fellow incompetent sous chef how to make a decent breakfast. *Heaves a deep sigh*The two grownups are an absolute disasters in the kitchen. I draw my little stool and stand there making myself tall and shout instructions to the duo. I tell you I would have made Gordon Ramsay proud. Of course you understand I'm not allowed to swear like him as yet but I come pretty close.

2.After the un successful breakfast cum brunch service and giving them a rundown on why I refused to eat some of the portions and threw away some of them on the floor I decide its time to get them to do some physical activity. Being the lazybones and couch potatoes they both are its up to me to whip them to shape. Worst among the lot is my mom. Now I know why the poor trainer finally gave up and took a transfer back to Toronto after valiantly trying to get her off her butt for months together. Now she has a perfect excuse you see that she is trying to make me a sibling blah blah. So I have given up on her and try to get my sole trainee into shape by getting him to play hockey with me. We cruise around the living room and he tries usually very hard to keep up with my star status. But the poor guy always fails and always fibs that he lets me win. I don't think he is ready to accept that I'm a star in the making. *pouts*

3.Meanwhile we moved on to play with my Dora tent where I keep all my secret stashes of toys. All the commotion suddenly wakes the constantly sleeping mom from sleep. I think she is bitten by some bug and now suffering from sleeping sickness of some kind. Why else would she snore at the drop of a hat? Anyway she now rubs her sleepy eyes and suddenly feels sad for the little child playing alone and offers to come and play with me inside my tent. Is she freaking kidding me?With the way she alarmingly seems to be expanding these days she has hopes that she can fit into my tent?I don't mince my words. I tell her "Mommy,you are not allowed into my tent". I'm not being cruel people,she really would rip my tent apart if she tries to squeeze through. To make her feel better later I pretend I'm mommy and walk around poking my belly and telling dad that I also have a baby in my tummy. It is a sure shot to get her smiling all the time.

4.It's still cold outside so I end up teaching them how to enjoy a Popsicle my way. They roll their eyes and say its messy and I give up trying to get them to live a little. And soon it's time for me to take my bath. I believe in cleanliness so I think everyone should take invest some exceptional time in bath tub. My mom being such a germophobic has passed those genes very generously into me and so I splash around water and scrub my water duckies also very clean before I get dragged unceremoniously out of the tub by the two grownups just after what I think was an hour at the most. Dad meanwhile tries to tease me telling that "Ina,you still smell" and turns up his nose. Being little miss manners that I am I immediately correct him telling "Daddy,that's rude. Never tell you smell. Always tell that you smell different" Mom meanwhile looks at me almost bursting with pride. Ah,my sibling has so much to live up to!I can't wait to show off the puny little sucker who is the real boss in the house *rubs hands in glee*

5.Next after dinner and all that jazz I dress up my freshly scrubbed friend and sit them all down for a bedtime story. Oh yes,I'm big enough to tell my own stories in case you were wondering. He listens before he dozes off,then I put him to bed and go to torture my folks a little more for my stories. Before they begin I warn then that I want at least "1,3,4,6 stories" so they go on for sometime. I clutch my teddy bear and slowly drift out to sleep dreaming of twinkling stars and another long week of hectic mornings and school days with my dad's snoring as my musical background. It keeps all those closet monsters away so I really don't mind it nowadays.

So that was one glimpse at my lazy weekend day. Hope you all had a fun weekend too. Tell me about it!!!

If you were wondering

What I have been upto for all the disappearing months.......

Completed 8 months of intern year and yes I'm still alive and ticking,thank you very much and still in one piece!yay!!

Went to Jamaica for a fun trip with PC Man to "ease up uno self" eased up a little too much and yep de ooman got knocked up! a loud hic heard before the "uh,oh!" moment you bet. Little Ina lately has been seen mysteriously hoarding artillery and weapons of mass destruction against imminent sibling competitor. yeah,it's gonna be so much fun,I can already feel it amidst of my morning sickness.

So the big day is in August,meanwhile I am sadly growing out of my small sized scrubs and having had to resort to stealing the medium to large ones from the OR. My little delirious old patients seem to think I'm the greatest creation in the universe and ahem,the most beautiful doctor in the world (Aishwarya and all the Angelina's watch out ,here I come) continue to make my day. Bless their sweet diabetic souls and atherosclerosis laden arteries and the dementia that clouds their brain for my regular "ego boosting" moments. Life's been fun,what can I say!

I finally made peace with the nasty winter. Yep,after battling and swearing after 3 weeks of successive -30 degree Celsius with a windchill thrown in between for good measure kicking it a notch up to -50 I lost my voice and had to bow down and became a victim of hypothermic brain freeze that makes people continue to exist in frigid land called Western Canada. I can drive like a pro on those roads which are nothing but Silky smooth sheets of ice. I am so going to replace my RAV 4 with this one with skies........Fun times never stop,you see!

So if there is still any friendly souls out there who so kindly drop by this blog now and then do talk to me. How has life been?I'm eager to know and hopefully won't disappear again:)